Update

This post is just so that I have all my thoughts/feelings written down and documented. Feel free to read or not read or just skim.


So, I spoke too soon and put way too much pressure on the rest of Saturday and Sunday to rise to my challenge of being better days than their predecessors. Saturday afternoon, I was at the hospital with all of my family members, tending to my grandmother, when I decided to call my father at the hospital. The CCU nurse told me that he wasn't able to speak because he had an oxygen mask on. This was startling because when I spoke to him on Thursday and Friday, he seemed fine and it looked like he was ready to leave the hospital.

So, my dad's nurse gets on the phone and starts saying something about oxygen and machines and I was very confused so I asked him to start from the begining - from when my father was brought into the hospital. He spoke for 15 minutes and I really didn't understand what he was saying most of the time. He went into a lot of detail - every turn of my dad's condition from his heart to his kidney (he has a donated one) and then, eventually, the current problem - his lungs. He would explain every medication they gave him and the result, but all of this in "doctor-talk," a foreign language that I don't understand. All I could gather from the nurse was that my father was in critical condition and while it was not necessary at that moment to fly down, if his condition did not improve within 24 hrs, a doctor would be contacting me because it would be very serious.

My family quickly nominated me to fly down to Tampa so I booked a ticket for that afternoon. Now, let me interject that it might sound like I was very together, when in fact, I was not. I was crying my eyes out and holding onto my cousins/uncles/mother/aunts for dear life when any of them reached over to hug me. Within a half hour, I was given more than enough cash to cover a hotel room, plane ticket and other expense while in Florida. Now, if these were normal circumstances, I would been ecstatic to have tons of cash (not my own) to spend while taking a vacation in Florida. Unfortunately, its not the case and I would give anything to be sitting in my room, reading a book on a typical, hum drum Saturday morning.

I said good bye to my family in my grandma's hospital room, including grandma herself and of course, I started bawling and so did everyone else in the room. I got home, grabbed a suitcase and started throwing random clothing into it, praying that I could turn some of it into a wearable outfit. My friend drove me to the airport, hugged me good bye and then I was on my own and a nervous wreck. To make matters worse, I got picked to go through the special security where I had to go through that machine that blows air at you and then a gruff looking security guard went through all my belongings with a fine tooth comb. Eventually, I found myself with an hour and a half before my flight started boarding and started to look for fun airport activities to calm my nerves.

Five minutes before I'm about to board, I've got a cup of coffee and a couple magazines (Ms. and Vanity Fair), a new pair of headphones and have started to calm down. My cell phone starts to ring and I look down and see it is my cousin, Asma calling. Thinking she is calling to tell me to have a safe flight, I pick up, cheerfully, trying to sound like the strong, responsible Aneesa they've sent to Tampa to take care of things. On the other end of the line is a tearful Asma who tells me my grandmother has just passed away.

Shit.

Now, I know that my friends have constantly joked with me about how my life often plays out like a television show or movie but this is starting to get ridiculous. I think that if all of these events happened to me within the span of 2 - 3 shows, the critics would say there's too much drama and that it won't make the ratings soar through the roof, as the producers had planned. It would backfire and there would be no Emmy nominations and no TV Guides that I would grace the cover of.

As my plane lands in Tampa, it is dark but I can still make out the palm trees, which gives me a strange feeling. Usually, whenever my plane lands any place where there are palm trees, I get excited because I know I'm in for a good time.

Ok, can't write any more. To be continued.