So, I haven't really updated this blog as much as I would like to. I always come up with ideas for posts and start writing them and never finish. I just looked through the incomplete ones and for some of them, I can barely figure out where I was going with it. So, I'm going to make a resolution (yes, I know its not New Year yet) to complete what I start. So, whether its a blog post or the Ikea Hemnes shelf/drawer unit thingy that's been sitting in the living room with no door for about 5 days, or a box that I have opened but not completely unpacked, I am going to start finishing things.
Anyways, in light of that spirit, I'm going to do a mega post with a condensed version of all the unfinished posts from the last couple months. And some of it will be in past tense and some will be in present. Deal with it.
August:
Other than the massive crack in the windshield, the car is driving fine. Its taking a lot of time to get used to how big the body of the car is but I think I'm getting the hang of it. I just hope I don't have to do a lot of parallel parking. (Is this foreshadowing? Hmm....)
September:
Football season is FINALLY back!!! I'm a little disappointed with my fantasy picks but I think I'll be okay. I didn't get LT, who pretty much carried my entire team on his back last year but I'm excited about Steve Smith, Frank Gore and TJ Houshmanzadeh. Not too excited about Mark Bulger, though. I think I took him with my second pick and I had my fingers on Tony Romo's name. I had even peeled back a corner. NOT because he's the Cowboys' starter (or because he's dreamy) but because I KNOW what I saw last season and I KNOW it'll be good! But, like a moron, I listen to Jason, who reassures me that a) Romo will be a good back up to have and that b) i can draft him in later rounds since he's sure no one will pick him up. Well as luck would have it, Candice picked Romo up RIGHT before I was going to. DAMMIT!
Also, there is a new job offer in the works - quite possibly my dream job (for this age). We'll see how it works out.
Early October
Restaurant Eve is quite possibly the BEST restaurant I have been to this year in the DC area! At the beginning of the year, I told myself I would try more DC area restaurants and not stick to my old favorites. So, I had been to Smith & Wollensky, Blue Duck Tavern, DC Coast and a few others I don't remember off the top of my head. But, we went to Restaurant Eve last night for Court's bach. party and the food was absolutely amazing. I had cream of parsnip and something soup to start. And then prime rib for dinner. That was some of the best steak I've had - I'll even go so far as to say better than the fillet I had at S & W. The rosemary fingerling potatoes were also exquisite. I've made rosemary roasted potatoes and they tasted NOTHING like the ones I had at Restaurant Eve. It was almost as if they found a way to infuse the rosemary flavor into each piece. Then for dessert I had birthday cake - yup that's right. A mini birthday cake - yellow cake with white icing. It was yummy to say the least. Plus, Abi brought some of the wines from the vineyard she works at so we had several bottles throughout the night. Apparently, the restaurant has a "no BYOW policy" but since Abi works where she works, the sommelier was more than happy to oblige.
The Wedding
As far as American weddings go, Court and Tom's was quite possibly the most perfect one I've been to. Ok, so I've only been to one other but I'm counting the ones I've seen on TV too! It was on Sugarloaf Mt. at a mansion and the weather was perfect and the bridesmaids looked perfect and the cake was perfect and the music was perfect. I think I started tearing up when I saw Turk walking to the altar and they overflowed when Abi walked past. Courtney looked stunning and the ceremony was beautiful. I can't even describe how perfectly that ceremony fit Tom and Court. It wasn't stuffy and boring - it was full of life and Courtney was throwing her head back and laughing and really enjoying the moment. She came out to the Allman Brothers song, "Blue Sky" and Tom put his glasses on so he could see her as she walked towards him. And I cried some more. Turk read a poem and then the kiss was so romantic! And don't even get me started on the food - crab cakes and steak!! How can you go wrong with that!? It was all amazing. I think the whole event was simply breathtaking and it really made me stop and consider their relationship. I know that there is a cliche about single women at weddings and how it makes them want to get married and such and I don't want to fall into that category. But, I will say that being there and witnessing it made me want to strive for a lot more in my pursuits. As dorky as this sounds, it made me want to find someone who is as perfect for me as Tom is for Court and I really don't want to settle for anything less.
End of October:
Why, oh why did I listen to Jason and not go with my gut!?!?!? It is now almost week 9 and Romo's QB stats are second only to Tom Brady's! And I've since benched Bulger with his bruised ribs and lackluster performances for Brett Favre. My fantasy team is not doing well, despite having some high scoring players :( At least I'm starting Favre, who I love and adore but apparently, not as much as Chris Berman does.
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Monday, October 8, 2007
What's a Girl Gotta Do??
There is either something wrong with the cosmic forces that control this universe or my perception of things is completely off.
I'm 25 and after years of dating, I thought that I would have gained some sort of insight or knowledge that I didn't have 10 years ago. And for the most part, I think that is true. I don't believe in fairy tales or Prince Charmings anymore. I don't assume that all wayward romances will end in a chase and some sweet, dramatic gesture like they do in the movies. I know I don't have it all figured out but I usually feel like with every passing year and with every new experience, I learn something new and as a result become wiser.
Then, as it has a way of some times doing, life throws me a curve ball. There is someone who I have amazing chemistry with. We can talk on the phone for over an hour about absolutely nothing and have a ball. We have fun doing all kinds of random things together. He makes me laugh when all I want to do is cry and even though he won't admit it, I know I make him laugh too. We love trying new things together and he's done some of the sweetest things that anyone has ever done for me. We're both incredibly physically attracted to each other and many times, various people have commented on the way we look at each other. But, we're not together and we never were and we never will be.
I'm the kind of person who needs to find answers to questions that puzzle me and I usually can't let something go until I do - no matter how mundane it is. When things haven't worked out with other men, there's usually been a reason as to why it didn't. Some times it hasn't been clear but I've usually been able to find it. I've never been able to find the reason as to why me and him can't be together.
I've tried countless times to convince myself that the chemistry is one-sided but after 2 and a half years, its just not possible to ignore it. I've tried to convince myself that he doesn't really care much at all - that he acts the way he does with me with everyone else. That doesn't work either. The mystery never got solved - I just eventually stopped trying to figure it out.
But now, the old questions have crept back up and they're begging to be answered. Its my own fault for letting him get to me. You know what they say - "fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me." I'm back where I was 2 years ago and this time the stakes are much higher. We've grown to be good friends - I've come to care about him with almost the same intensity as some of my closest friends. After just 2 years, he knows me better than a lot of people.
I know we won't be together. He won't get on a plane and come rescue me in Paris. He won't chase me to the air port as my flight is leaving. I know he won't climb up the fire escape with roses. And I know I won't get the answer to my most pressing question, which is "why don't you want to be with me?" I already know how this story ends. I know that eventually the questions will get the better of me and they'll keep gnawing away at my mind and my heart until the only solution will be to cut him out of my life. And that's the saddest part of the story because I'll have lost a good friend.
The question that alarms me the most is "If I can't make it work with him, under these circumstances, then who can I make it work with?"
I'm 25 and after years of dating, I thought that I would have gained some sort of insight or knowledge that I didn't have 10 years ago. And for the most part, I think that is true. I don't believe in fairy tales or Prince Charmings anymore. I don't assume that all wayward romances will end in a chase and some sweet, dramatic gesture like they do in the movies. I know I don't have it all figured out but I usually feel like with every passing year and with every new experience, I learn something new and as a result become wiser.
Then, as it has a way of some times doing, life throws me a curve ball. There is someone who I have amazing chemistry with. We can talk on the phone for over an hour about absolutely nothing and have a ball. We have fun doing all kinds of random things together. He makes me laugh when all I want to do is cry and even though he won't admit it, I know I make him laugh too. We love trying new things together and he's done some of the sweetest things that anyone has ever done for me. We're both incredibly physically attracted to each other and many times, various people have commented on the way we look at each other. But, we're not together and we never were and we never will be.
I'm the kind of person who needs to find answers to questions that puzzle me and I usually can't let something go until I do - no matter how mundane it is. When things haven't worked out with other men, there's usually been a reason as to why it didn't. Some times it hasn't been clear but I've usually been able to find it. I've never been able to find the reason as to why me and him can't be together.
I've tried countless times to convince myself that the chemistry is one-sided but after 2 and a half years, its just not possible to ignore it. I've tried to convince myself that he doesn't really care much at all - that he acts the way he does with me with everyone else. That doesn't work either. The mystery never got solved - I just eventually stopped trying to figure it out.
But now, the old questions have crept back up and they're begging to be answered. Its my own fault for letting him get to me. You know what they say - "fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me." I'm back where I was 2 years ago and this time the stakes are much higher. We've grown to be good friends - I've come to care about him with almost the same intensity as some of my closest friends. After just 2 years, he knows me better than a lot of people.
I know we won't be together. He won't get on a plane and come rescue me in Paris. He won't chase me to the air port as my flight is leaving. I know he won't climb up the fire escape with roses. And I know I won't get the answer to my most pressing question, which is "why don't you want to be with me?" I already know how this story ends. I know that eventually the questions will get the better of me and they'll keep gnawing away at my mind and my heart until the only solution will be to cut him out of my life. And that's the saddest part of the story because I'll have lost a good friend.
The question that alarms me the most is "If I can't make it work with him, under these circumstances, then who can I make it work with?"
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